@ELEANOR PATTER
@DATA TYPE: RETROSPECTIVE
@LANGUAGE: ENGLISH
@COUNTRY: FRANCE
@PARTICIPANTS: S 
@SETTING: PRIVATE
@TIME: LATE
@SCHOOL: SECONDARY

1  Reflecting on live recording

Did you feel you gave the right impression of yourself?

* I believe I did: I was honest in my response.  We covered a wide range of topics, from classroom conditions to holiday plans.
* This wasn't however the first meeting, because we met first to arrange to meet and record.  Then the first time we met to record, I didn't have the French adaptor with me.  I made notes on that meeting, though.  The recording still counts as fairly introductory, as our contact leading up to it was minimal.
* I did feel that the only reason we met up and talked was purely to fulfil the project (PIC) requirements as outside of that she was really quite irrelevant to my situation.  (I don't mean this in a bad way!)  So it was quite artificial/prefabricated.  I don't know if this might affect the impression I gave myself, ie the falseness and prefabricatedness making an unnatural atmosphere and affecting the recording accordingly.  
* I wasn't worried about the meeting/ recording, so that wouldn't have affected the communication.
* She did ask about settling in/ social life type stuff in terms of where I live/ how I get around/ who I live with.  Didn't strike me as an issue, in terms of privacy invasion or whatever.  To me it was merely a topic of conversation like the previous and the subsequent.  I don't know how much she actually cared about the answer, as lack of problems/ issues meant there was nothing she needed to do.  I imagine it was a kind of formulaic generic conversation topic, as if there had been a problem it really wouldn't have been her job to resolve/ help resolve it.  Sure she could have given advice or whatever but for actual physical resolution/ help with it, I would have gone to Isabelle Mahou (in charge of language assistants in Poitiers) if necessary or sorted it out myself (as I did in one case of classroom problems).

Do you feel as though there was complete mutual understanding?

* Linguistically, yes, no physical communication problem caused by language.
* We basically had a chat and recorded it, the point of the talk was to record it!  I mean it was nice enough and all but fairly irrelevant to the settling in process, ie she had nothing to do with my timetable, my accommodation, my introduction period, etc etc.
* I think both of us knew this and it didn't cause any bother, we just got on with it, vaguely enjoyed it apart from the weirdness of being recorded and that was that.
How satisfied were you with the outcome of your interchange?

* Happy as a clam: we got done what we intended to get done, ie spoke and recorded it.  We had a nice chat.  No problemo.
* As there was nothing practical that was looking to be resolved by the meeting (ie timetable/ administrative stuff, there was nothing concrete as outcome needed.  (Beside the recording!)  Therefore no reason to be dissatisfied.  No expectations!

Do you feel in hindsight that your tmoignage is an accurate reflection of what happened during that interaction?

* Sort of.  It reminds me of an oral exam though.  Whereby none of the logistics etc comes into it, and it felt very formulaic. I suppose that was the interaction so maybe that means it's accurate!

Different schools ...

* She (Marie Dominique) is in the Maternelle bit of the school, which is a different site to where I was.  Her bit is called <school name>, my bit is <school name>.  I also teach at a different school <school name>.  This is what I mean by slightly irrelevant to my situation, as mentioned on the first page of this set of notes.  Was never going to 'bump' into her or anything.  I don't really know why she was my responsable!  (Also as she has nothing to do with being in charge of assistants in the way that Isabelle Mahou/ Sophie Gaumont are.)

2  Reflecting on your relationship with your responsable(s)

What was the initial impression of your responsable(s)?

* Sophie Gaumont (conseiller pdagogique, Poitiers)
Met me at the station
Drove me to the auberge where the stage was being held.
Gave me an information pack with maps, leaflets and schedule for the stage.
Was really nice, reassuring.

* Isabelle Mahou (in charge of assistants, Poitiers)
Met her after the stage, she was helpful (Sophie introduced her to us, us being Poitiers primary school assistants)
Helpful, ie driving us and clobber to accommodation
Driving us to town to change travellers' cheques so could pay for accommodation
* Marie Dominique
Can't remember exactly how I got in touch with her.  I suppose someone must have told me to go to the Maternelle and see her.
She was very nice, which was a relief.
Very sweet lady, very enthusiastic about the project.

Did this change over time?  If so, how?  Reasons?

Sophie Gaumont 
Only saw her again at assistants' meetings (meetings as guidance for the whole group of assistants, therefore, no 'change'/ 'development' to report.
Guessing that she is very busy with her position in the dpartement.  Still have her phone numbers in my phone, as garnered from prior to arrival email contact but have never used them!

* Isabelle
See her more often because she teaches on one of the days where I am at <school name>. Plus from time to time she will sit in on a class I teach and make notes and discuss with me after.  (Also does this with the other assistants.)
Plus the assistants' meetings which she and Sophie do.
At times she can make you feel a bit small, but I'm sure it's not intentional and maybe something to do with English not being her first language (I don't think?) and she always talks in it to me but in French to the French teacher people.
One time she asked me two questions about the other assistants - one regarding one who had had an injury type problem and one regarding how many wanted to come back next year.  When I couldn't answer because I didn't happen to know, she asked me if I ever saw the other assistants in a  kind of 'Are you a hermit?' tone.  But she was also smiling so it might have been a joke?  I haven't really figured her out but I am always on the defensive in communication exchange with her, though I have been trying to train myself out of it.  Maybe I just feel intimidated because if feels like she is judging me when maybe she actually isn't?  I don't know!  I'm sure she's very nice and it's just me being over-sensitive to the situation.  Though the other assistants don't like her that much either.

* Marie Dominique
No change' development as there is no reason to see her other than 'have a conversation'/ 'record a conversation' for the project.

* Teachers

<school name> 

One of them told me to hang out with the teachers at break instead of staying in my classroom (I have my own classroom at <school name> - it's great!!) and since then I always do and it's great.  I chat with them, they accept me and include me.  All really nice.  At the very beginning, they helped me plan a lesson but after that they left me to it.  Well, they asked me once or twice if I wanted extra help but when I said I was fine, they left it at that.  They are always present in the lessons except the one whereby I take half the class and she takes the other half, or stays with them anyway and the German language assistant (who I don't think I've met!)  Mme Chassagne gave me some feedback occasionally, well at the beginning but not anymore.  Assume that if I was doing something drastically wrong, they would say.  They have mainly given me autonomy/freedom to do what I want with my lessons.  The 'guidance' mainly came from the Acadmie (Sophie/ Isabelle) so it was a good balance. They seem to appreciate my innovation and generally my being there doing the classes.  They also support me with discipline, which is good.

<school name>

Teachers all very nice and welcoming but they expected me to know the timetable from the outset before I had it.  (I had a timetable but it only told me that eg Monday afternoons and Thursday mornings would be at <school name>, more precisely I had no information until I was handed a copy by the head.  When I first arrived, he wasn't there so I went to the staffroom and waited.  Teachers came in and asked who I was and I explained and they were like "Ah yes" in a kind of they expected me sort of way.  They told me which classes I had and introduced the appropriate teachers to me, who were all very friendly.

Occasionally they suggest things during the class, which is fine because it helps!  One writes what I say on the board quite a lot which took me aback at first, took me by surprise, but I didn't mind and now it's just an element particular to that class. They help me with discipline, like the <school name>  teachers, as they, too, are always in the classroom with me although (some at both places) just in the background, maybe marking or something and just intervene if the kids get too rowdy.

I had a particular problem with the CE2; they were very rowdy and didn't respect me/ listen to me at all.  Then, after a particularly bad session, when they had had a replacement teacher in because M Naturel (also the head) was absent, I left a note in M Naturel's pigeon hole explaining the problems I'd had and the next time I was in, he said that he and their other class teacher decided that they should have a punishment lesson and write (in French of course) what had happened and what should happen in English class along with an apology.  And that I should be in the class while they do that, so during my next session with them.  So that accordingly took place.  Since then the kids have been a lot better and we get on well!  I think they just needed boundaries clearly set and enforced.  They are a bit bratty still, but I'm very fond of them so they aren't at all bad really now!  Subsequently, Isabelle asked me why I hadn't told her.  To be honest, it happened, I dealt with it, life went on and it didn't occur to me to tell her.  If I hadn't been able to sort it with the teachers/ head, then I would have gone to her.  But as I had, it didn't occur to me to do so.   I don't see her in a social light, she is very much in a professional light in my mind and that's how I relate to her.  So once it was no longer a problem, there was no point in telling her.  Analogy: to me it seems the equivalent of someone telling on their peers without talking first to the peers and trying to sort the problem out, if I was to go to Isabelle first.  I prefer to deal with issues independently rather than run for help as first option.  Running for help is when there seems no other option.  Anyway, she seemed a bit put out that I hadn't said anything to her, hence why I have gone on and on about it in this account!  Sorry!

How has your relationship with your responsable changed since your last logbook entry?  If so, in what way?

* Marie Dominique - not really.  She is still just the nice lady who works at the site down the road.  No more, no less!

Do you feel that your logbook is a full and accurate reflection of your interactions with your responsable and/ or other members of staff.  Please tell about sort of thing left out and why.

No.  I kept it very neutral because wasn't sure how much would filter back tp people involved/ mentioned.  So I kept it very neutral/ positive.  The experience has been positive as a whole so it is not complete rubbish but I just omitted stuff like how I feel about the people/ their faon of interaction/ treating me etc and just recorded what happened more factually.  Probably a bit not to compromise my position, particularly as it is a nine month one.  Also, since I haven't complained verbally to anybody, it seems a bit two faced to write down complainty type stuff so I glossed it over.  Because none of it worth complaining about.  People are people and you just get on with it.  There was nothing importantly awful enough to merit writing bad stuff.  I hope that makes sense as an explanation!!

How do you feel about your responsable now?

* Isabelle - I think it's clear from what I have written so far in this chunk of writing!  So yeah, fine!  (Sorry, running out of time!)
* Sophie -She's nice.  I'm sure if I had a problem (real problem) I could contact her.  Same with Isabelle.  But wouldn't go to either of them if I didn't really need to, because that's just how I am!
* Marie Dominique - Fine, see rest of this chunk of writing!

To what extent and in what way do you think participating in the PIC Project affected your relationship?

Well, it was constructed purely for the project so it wouldn't have existed otherwise! (Marie Dominique one I mean.)
Sophie/Isabelle - not sure, don't feel I've been treated differently (thank goodness!) to the other assistants.

Misunderstandings/ communication difficulties?
* Not enough time to finish.Ow How 








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